Fears
My parents and I went for dinner last night and we talked about this trip and what I should watch for and what scared them most for me. My parents are worried that the logistics will not work out; my place might fall through, I might have troubles with visas or travel etc. Personally, I am more afraid of coming back.
My don from first year posted a really interesting article about travel which posits that the hardest part about travelling is coming home. (link: http://thoughtcatalog.com/kellie-donnelly/2014/07/the-hardest-part-about-traveling-no-one-talks-about/ ) Basically that once you get back from spending time abroad, you realize how much you have changed, while most things at home seem to be the same.
This is what scares me the most. I am afraid not to go away, but to come home. I feel like going on exchange is probably one of the greatest experiences I will ever have. I have no doubt at all that I will meet great people, experience amazing new things, see things that will truly stun me, and change the way I see the world forever. Sure there will be ups and downs along the way. Statistically, I will probably get my pocket picked, I know I will have to go to every class every single day (not that I don’t do that already… haha) I’ll probably miss home and miss my friends and family, but these are things I will get over. Coming back to ‘reality’ in Canada where life is very ‘business as usual’ will be a huge shock to me. It will probably be like coming down from cloud nine. Coming home to my own bed in the greatest country in the world with so many wonderful friends will absolutely be nice but I fill probably want to keep travelling.
I am also worried that everyone I was close to before leaving Kingston will have different lives and different friends when I return. I worry that my friend group(s) will have new experiences of which I was not a part making it hard to still be friends. I think we are incredibly lucky to live in a time where keeping in touch is so easy, but it becomes difficult to balance exploring the world and staying connected to the social network. We are so used to being wired into our networks at all times- look at how many people have their phones on them all the time- that we sometimes forget just to see the world and appreciate it. I really want to connect with Morocco but I don’t want to lose touch with everyone from back home. It will be tough to balance, but I will do my best to be in touch with all of you.
In the mean time, I am going on an adventure for the next nine months, and could not be more excited. 42 days and counting!